Repair disconnection, find intimacy and deepen love with your partner. Develop healthy, productive ways to communicate with each other and get your needs met. Your relationship is worth it. All you need is someone to help you along the way.
What is Couples Therapy?
In spite of couples loving each other, we can all get caught in unhealthy behavior patterns. All couples deal with conflict, but many of us have never learned how to manage it effectively. It can be hard to express our feelings, manage frustration, or effectively repair disconnection. We may find ourselves having the same argument over and over again, or refuse to discuss certain subjects to avoid a fight. Sometimes we may feel betrayed or disappointed by our partners and not know how to repair an injury or rekindle our affections.
I help couples understand the patterns that cause distress in their relationship and teach them healthier ways to relate to each other. Couples therapy is designed to help both of you become effective listeners and to learn how to communicate your own needs in a productive way so that you can bring connection, joy and passion back into your partnership.
The Benefits of Couples Therapy
Couples therapy can benefit almost anyone, including those who wish to:
- Repair disconnection when you feel abandoned by your partner
- Learn about your relationship patterns and attachment style
- Get unstuck and find effective ways to communicate your needs
- De-escalate conflict and stop the negative cycle of repetitive arguing
- Learn what to do when you feel like you’ve “fallen out of love”
- Rekindle or discover new passion and desire for your partner
- Manage disagreements before they become painful arguments
- Address sexual concerns and experience deeper levels of intimacy
- Learn how to manage major life transitions (birth, loss, illness)
- Recover from affairs, infidelity, or addiction relapse
To learn more about how couples counseling can benefit you, contact couples therapist Theresa Bullock Cohen
If you’re thinking about couples therapy and have questions, here is some useful information to get you started.
- Those in committed relationships who have hit a bump in the road and want a “tune-up”
- Pre-marital counseling to increase communication prior to marriage
- Transition counseling for couples experiencing change (from becoming new parents to empty nesters)
- Crisis counseling for couples experiencing affairs, addiction relapse, sudden illness or loss
In addition, I draw upon my training as a psychodynamic clinician to recognize and process underlying dynamics, barriers to intimacy, and sexual challenges, as well as using my cognitive behavioral training to teach communication strategies.
In EFT, couples learn to identify their negative communication cycle, regulate their emotions, heal their attachment injuries and send clear emotional signals to their partner. They also learn how to respond in a healthy way to the signals that are sent to them. When couples can clearly communicate and respond to attachment needs, it can create the safety, trust and support that couples long for.
When our attachment needs are not met — for instance when our partner is physically present but emotionally distant or disappoints us at a key moment — relationship distress can occur. This disconnection can prompt demanding, defensive, or avoidant behavior and result in feelings such as anger, sadness or fear.
In couples therapy, it means that we need a partner whom we can trust, depend on and be confident that we matter to them. Once your partner understands your attachment needs, you can work together to rebuild connections and deepen intimacy.
Over the last 10 years, I have attended numerous continuing education seminars on couples therapy through Harvard Medical School, the Society for Sex Therapy and Research, and Imago Couples Therapy.
I also completed a yearlong post-graduate training program through the Family Institute of Cambridge where I learned cognitive behavioral strategies to help couples improve their communication skills. I completed a three-year post-graduate fellowship through the Psychoanalytic Center for Families and Couples of New England in order to have a specialized understanding of the psychodynamic underpinnings about how our past affects our present relationship patterns. Most recently, I have completed an externship in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy which is an empirically-based model designed to help couples accept, express, regulate and transform emotion.